Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
