Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize