so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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