but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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