I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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