i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
