If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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