My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
