I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
His nipple licking is glorious
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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