I never want to see another naked old woman again.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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