Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
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