Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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