we're blogging at a bar
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
