i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Randomize
