In the future we'll all be gay
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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