I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
