fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
why do cheetos always look like penises
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
