So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
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