I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
