So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I looked at my own cervix.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
