so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
