he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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