White coat. Heels.
All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
