i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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