I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
