It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Randomize
