Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Life is so much better after having sex.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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