just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
