I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize