he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
