Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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