I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
