It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
