Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
