do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
