As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize