i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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