Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
My ATM looks so different sober.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize
