You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
