Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
