fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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