got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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