covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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