I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
