oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
