Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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