how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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