I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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