no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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