You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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