I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
